It's a crappy game to play and we all know it! I'm referring to the Should Game. It's a rotten one, a trap. It goes like..."I should finish this...," "I should be more X, Y or Z...," "I should... I should... I should". Yuck! When you have big (or even little) decisions to make, choose not to play the Should Game. The best choices do not come from the Should Game. (Of course, there are responsibilities but that's different.) The question to ask yourself is -- "Does this feel right for me?". The Should Game does not take into consideration the *feeling of things*. If the soft message in your chest says, "No, this doesn't feel right," then bravely LISTEN TO IT and shut up the Should Game.
Listen to the feeling of things and do your best to ignore the Should Game.
It hit me like a thud when someone said it to me. I was blindsided by it and it radically changed my perspective...for the better. I'm referring to the realization that the thoughts I had in my head were deeply affecting my life.
Perfectionism comes in a variety of forms but let's break it down in the hopes of helping you end the perfectionism habit.
There is absolutely no way to know when our last day will be. Ultimately, we don't have control of this. Scary, for sure, especially when so much of our lives are predicated on various systems or controls -- laws, logic, etiquette.
As a parent, spouse, coach, daughter, friend, yogi, cook, housekeeper (sort of), and NYC city dweller, life is full and fast. I love doing things. I like action and revelry but I also love my quiet alone time.
A dear client of mine was having a hard time and couldn't find balance in her life. She was working a lot, late into the evenings on weekdays and most weekends. She was stressed out, over eating, missing her family...
Just 30 days ago, I began a challenge to write a blog post for 30 days straight. It knew it would help me reach more people and I love writing. But there were thoughts in my head that were negative; fleeting ideas that maybe I didn't know what to write about and concerns about what people might think.
This may be obvious to some but often times people forget the importance of maintaining the basics of self care. There are some fundamentals that need to be accounted for in one's life to make for overall well being and balance.
I've been thinking about 2016 and what I want to create in it. I have a process that works. It's a straightforward recipe that gets me in the groove of making what I want happen. If you follow it, it will work for you as well.
In October, I wrote a post about recognizing one's thoughts and making a effort to shift it towards joyful ideas when you recognize that your thoughts are 'somewhere else'.
Ack! Can you picture walking away from a conversation with a new group of people or familiar folks and feeling insecure about what you shared?